Seems that Ireland has made the decision to begin taxing online gambling transactions to raise money for the country.  How will it work?  They will tax all foreign online casino operators who provide their services to residents of the country.  Which means what exactly?  If an online casino desires to make money from local citizens, they’ll have to pay an advertising tax.  Any international online casino sites will have to get a license to advertise to the Irish.

This is a new development, as offshore companies have not had to pay any kind of tax or get a license until now.  So will it work?  Not clear.  One online casino operator claims that residents will just use alternative sites that don’t have a license.  While it’s a step in the right direction to begin taxing and regulating the online gambling industry, there doesn’t seem to be any way to keep people from just going around it and using offshore casino games providers.

Still, I tip my hat to Ireland who seems to be one step ahead of certain countries like the US who still haven’t figured out that online gambling isn’t going anywhere.

Online gambling has changed the entertainment world forever. No longer must you drag your fat butt to Atlantic City on a bus of disgusting gambling addicts. No more must you fly to Las Vegas to watch some trailer trash not be able to afford another round of Pabst Blue Ribbons because they blew their last $7 on casino games.

Mobile casino games are where it’s at and that’s not changing any time soon. In fact, we’re still in the early stages of development. The ability to play online poker or online blackjack will only continue to get easier, there’s no question about it.

Two mobile communications giants, Motorola and Verizon, recently announced the development of their new mobile phone, rumored to be the first real threat to the iPhone. Everything it can’t do, the Droid WILL which includes offering even better online casino games than before.

How so? Better browsing ability. Much higher resolution graphics. Thin, easy-to-transport design. Actual keypad. Much faster than the iPhone. Hotter casino bartenders. Ok, so I made the last one up. Nevertheless, it’s 3.7 inch display makes it easier to play online casino games which apparently load much faster and look much better with its superrich HD color display.

So get excited, people, because it’s only going to get better. It’s Apple’s turn to respond. Let’s go, iPhone. Time to get Pabst Blue Ribbon online!

Just yesterday morning, Governor Ed Rendell announced that his plans to lay the smack down, vetoing any bill planning to legalize table games at casinos which fail to produce a minimum of $200 million in new revenue this year. This means that every casino must pay fifteen million dollars up front. (Think Dr. Evil: “Fifteen MIIIIIIIIIIIILLION DOLLARS!”) It’s a lot of cash and it doesn’t stop there. These casinos would also need to pay a tax rate of at least 16% on casino games such as blackjack, roulette, poker, and other games. I said AT LEAST….legislators will decide, that’s just the starting point.

Dude, your Phillies just went up 3-1 over the Dodgers. Why so serious???

The need to find the right balance will help raise revenue from casino games while still allowing casinos to make money from adding table games.

“It has to produce enough revenue… the same amount of revenue that we put into the budget. Absent that, I will veto a bill that comes in with license fees and taxes at a figure that’s too low to produce that revenue. Basically, it’s $15 million in license fees and 16 percent in taxes.”

Thanks, Ed. Unbelievably, the House of Representatives is proposing a 34% tax rate with the Senate only 14%. Let’s give it up for the Senate!

Wherever the number falls, the writing is on the wall. More and more aspiring online gambling moguls will be setting up online casino sites as opposed to brick-and-mortar. It’s just too expensive. Even if it doesn’t matter to the average casino games junkie, this is more about the casino owners. Stay tuned. And go, Phillies.

As the biggest provider of online gambling software in the world, Micrograming is known for leading the way in new casino games. So what do they have in store for us this fall? Let’s check it out:

1) Kung Fu Monkey Video Slot

“Get your hands off of me, you damn dirty ape.” Ever since Charlton Heston muttered those words so famously, monkeys have held a special place in our hell. And in this newest video slots game, things are no different. With a martial arts motif in the background, the path to payout is blocked by some pissed-off monkeys with a five reel, fifteen payline game. There’s a big bonus waiting if you can get passed monkey ninjas and other obstacles. Nothing says online slots like monkeys. And I’m not just pulling your banana.

2) Texas Hold’em Bonus Poker

If you aren’t familiar with Texas Hold’em, you’ve been living under a large rock. Or in a monkey cage. What’s special about this online poker game is that there’s no bet after the river. The graphics are great and gives a more realistic game. From everything from the movement of the chips to the background music, this is a great game.

3) Pure Platinum Video Slot

The newest online video slot game is a good one. The graphics are extravagant and make you feel like you’re in a real upscale casino. The free spin rewards are big and the five reel, forty payline gives you ample opportunities to win with scatters, free spins, wilds, multipliers, and more. With no threat of ass-kicking monkeys.

4) Wooly World Video Slot

Think global climate change is just a bunch of crap? Here’s an inconvenient truth: the ice age is back and the wooly mammoths and cavement in this slot game are here to prove it. Like the Pure Platinum game, there are plenty of rewards with the added possibility to double or quadruple wins. As long as you don’t freeze your ass off.

So there you have it, the newest online games from Microgaming. So much fun, who needs tigers?

What will the commission regulate exactly? Everything from sports betting, the lottery, horseracing, and of course, all the casino games you can think of: online blackjack, poker, the works. And to fulfill its government role of caretaker of its citizens, the BCLC will even be introducing advertising promoting responsible gaming. Awww….

If you’re wondering where this came from, it wasn’t just out of the blue (or Vancouver). According to commission President Michael Graydon, the region loses millions of tax dollars to offshore sites who run their own online casino sites. With its citizens wagering around $87 million, that’s a lot of money, especially in a territory with just over four million people. Graydon speculates that his citizens would rather spend their money with commission-regulated sites, not only out of loyalty, but out of trust.

With the BCLC maintaining a monopoly over online gambling in the region, there is no telling if it will support independent online casinos which attempt to compete with the commission. It is thought however that competition would help the BCLC, not hurt it.

And if it means we might see an SCTV online casino in the future, bring it on. John Candy dealing blackjack? I can’t wait.

Well, it seems that there are more benefits than anyone could have imagined before last weekend. You can add “multi-player chats which can save your life” to the list. No joke. Just a few days ago, a woman in Tulsa was saved by EMTs summoned to hear house by her fellow online gamblers. Read on.

Nita Renee found herself at her favorite online casino playing canasta. Through the chat function, she noticed the word “help” pop up from one of her fellow players. Upon confirming that this was not a joke, Renee determined her location before calling 911. When paramedics arrived to the house in Nebraska, they found a 70 year-old woman named Lucille Kimball stuck under a chimney which had collapsed onto her body below. Turns out she had been calling for help for hours and Renee was the first to respond. The woman’s phone was out of reach and she could only type with one hand.

Dale Thomas, volunteer EMT said, “If she wouldn’t have been able to get ahold of this woman in Oklahoma, she wouldn’t be with us.” While Kimball did not break any bones, she lost a lot of blood and had surgery over the weekend to improve her condition.

Renee hasn’t let the events phase her, saying she was just doing what she was supposed to do, responding to a woman who needed help.

Just another reason to visit an online casino: casino games and responsible players.

And why wouldn’t he be? Check this out: the casino will be built in the resort’s front yard and will include a swimming pool, walking paths, a reflecting pool, park benches to sit down and count your winnings, and a leisure area to relax in.

Did someone say reflecting pool? Hel-looooo? This is a CASINO! I don’t need everybody seeing my full house just because some drunk teenagers want to re-enact the Forrest Gump in DC scene. Here’s an idea: how about a black, concrete pool? See, this is why I stick to my online casino. Fewer reflecting pools.

Anyway, where were we? The casino itself will have just about every game imaginable: craps, poker, blackjack, roulette, slots, the works. And just to give a big thank you to its players (and a visit of Lady Luck), gamblers will enjoy a complimentary bottle of wine at 8 PM every evening. And the construction will facilitate improved guest arrivals and departures. Which is good when you want a big winner to get the hell out and never come back.

The beautiful Greenbrier has won numerous awards in the hotel business and has been welcoming guests since 1778.  Unless George Washington liked to play a little online blackjack in the Oval Office, who knows, maybe he frequented this place.  (Yeah, I know he pre-dated the White House.  This is an online gambling blog, not The History Channel.)

So there you go. If you’ve got money to spend and friends in West Virginia to impress, stop by the Greenbrier in 2010. If not, well, I’ll see you at the online casino.

How do you say “hit me” in Spanish? “Fifty dollars on red” in Italian? “Jesus Christ, the bachelorette at the slots just threw up all over herself” in French?

If you can answer any of these questions (ok, aside from the last one), you may be interested in the new offering from OnlinePlayersAssociation.co.uk (OPA). OPA, the premier online casino featuring all the casino games in the galaxy, announced today an addition to their site with their news updates now being offered in….wait for it….English, French, German, Italian, and Spanish. What, no Klingon?

At the present time, the site’s “Latest News” features news stories concerning the sale of WPT, LadbrokesCasino.com’s taking part in an online slots tournament, a report on 888’s profitability, and more. In addition, there are sections for “More Casino News”, “Bonus News”, and “Most Popular News”. Who knew there was so much news?

The top right corner of the screen displays flags representing each of the languages: Britain, France, German, Italy, and Spain. (Don’t tell the Americans that the Brits have taken back English; they’ll go crazy!!! No worries about them finding out here….can they even read? Oh, everybody relax, I’m an American, it’s all in fun. Now where were we….AH, yes, online casino news.)

A quick click on one of the flags takes you to the same page translated into one of these languages, giving you all kinds of information about casino games, casino articles, and more….”more”, now including the news updates.

This from Senior OPA Editor Marty Dershwin: “With the addition of news in so many languages, we really feel OPA has everything a new or veteran player could want.” Hey, Marty, when are we getting free online drinks?

So there you go, OPA just got a little better and a little more international. Sorry, Klingons, your day will come…someday.

According to a opponents of a constitutional amendment to be voted on in November, churches and non-profit organizations will no longer be able to sponsor craps, Texas Hold ‘Em, and other casino games pending an Ohio vote. Don’t that just take the “hallelujah!” out of your sails?

While the proposal will actually legalize tens of thousands of slot machines in Ohio’s biggest cities in addition to legalizing bingo, lotteries, and horse racing, everything NOT mentioned (such as church gaming nights) would thereby be outlawed.

Really?! The amendment also does not mention shoving a McDonald’s quarter-pounder down my pants, is that also barred? What about playing online blackjack wearing a Tweet jacket and a single sock, a la the Red Hot Chili Peppers? I just don’t get it….the world economy is in shambles, Ohio’s two professional football teams have a combined record of 8-487 this decade, and somebody’s proposed an amendment to outlaw some friendly cash games. I don’t get it. These angry voters aren’t even taking on the big fish, the casinos. Who knows why, they’re going after a bunch of retired senior citizens who probably don’t frequent the online casino because their 1998 AOL connection’s too slow.

Here’s some positive news. Former mayor of Cincinnati Charlie Luken interprets the amendment differently, arguing that the casino games not mentioned in the bill will NOT be affected in any way. Moreover, fortunately, some suspect that the lost revenues will be minimal. Father Bob Penhallurick, a pastor at an Ohio Catholic church, said that he didn’t expect a heavy financial impact from the losses.

We’ll see what happens. And I’ll see you at church.

So just a few days ago, we advised aspiring moguls to consider starting an online casino instead of doing it the old-fashioned way. As for those of you who are content simply to gamble without actually starting up your own place, here’s one reason you may want to stay home and play your casino games online…

This just in: Apparently the Rivers Casino in Pittsburgh’s been charging a whopping fifty dollars to park in their casino the day of Steelers home games. The alternative is of course to agree to wager a minimum of eighty bucks in order to get free parking (yeah, sounds REAL free to me.)

You think the brick-and-mortar places are hurting? After the preseason game between the Super Bowl champions and the Arizona Cardinals, the casino decided to drop their parking fees after posting its worst day of the year. Seems that the casino decided to have mercy on its customers, seeing that, oh I don’t know….WE’RE IN THE WORST RECESSION SINCE THE GREAT DEPRESSION. According to casino president Ed Fasulo: “We’re open seven days and the worst day of the week was Steeler day. You don’t have to hit us over the head too many times with a two-by-four. That was the first test for us. We saw what happened. We realized what happened. We realized what some of the perceptions were. We wanted to change that.”

So what can we take from this? One, apparently the casino president is getting hit in the head by a two-by-four. That definitely has no place in an online casino. Two, you may as well play your casino games at home and avoid crazy fees. Because though they may have been waived here, no telling what may happen once the economy turns around. Third of all…watch out for flying two-by-fours. Happy gambling!