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Got plans for Saturday night? Planning to head to “Casino Games” night at Toledo United Methodist Church? You might want to restock your Netflix queue instead.

According to a opponents of a constitutional amendment to be voted on in November, churches and non-profit organizations will no longer be able to sponsor craps, Texas Hold ‘Em, and other casino games pending an Ohio vote. Don’t that just take the “hallelujah!” out of your sails?

While the proposal will actually legalize tens of thousands of slot machines in Ohio’s biggest cities in addition to legalizing bingo, lotteries, and horse racing, everything NOT mentioned (such as church gaming nights) would thereby be outlawed.

Really?! The amendment also does not mention shoving a McDonald’s quarter-pounder down my pants, is that also barred? What about playing online blackjack wearing a Tweet jacket and a single sock, a la the Red Hot Chili Peppers? I just don’t get it….the world economy is in shambles, Ohio’s two professional football teams have a combined record of 8-487 this decade, and somebody’s proposed an amendment to outlaw some friendly cash games. I don’t get it. These angry voters aren’t even taking on the big fish, the casinos. Who knows why, they’re going after a bunch of retired senior citizens who probably don’t frequent the online casino because their 1998 AOL connection’s too slow.

Here’s some positive news. Former mayor of Cincinnati Charlie Luken interprets the amendment differently, arguing that the casino games not mentioned in the bill will NOT be affected in any way. Moreover, fortunately, some suspect that the lost revenues will be minimal. Father Bob Penhallurick, a pastor at an Ohio Catholic church, said that he didn’t expect a heavy financial impact from the losses.

We’ll see what happens. And I’ll see you at church.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 25th, 2009 at 12:08 pm and is filed under Blog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

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